cheesy fries tags my blog
think hes the cool dude from the block
juggling his dick and disgusting balls
someone please tell him who's de boss.
useless jerk pieceless shit
criticising others raps and blogs
so if you think for a second
and pity this poor soul
about his words and actions he shows
is stupid and dumb
tagging my blog by rapping his cords
to show off his skills and wat, balls?
he said my dick is small and weak
oh well, thats because ive an asian dick
so if urs is thick and big
what are u trying to get at
then girls will like to lick ur fucking dick?
sick shit u digusting ass
peeking at other's dick whilte they pee

here's a suggestion for you big dick
go find your mom's pussy and stick your dick in
or maybe get your grandma's one,
she's had menopause so its safer.

get wicked get sick, well get a life.

EXPLICIT CONTENT.
IF U CAN TAKE MY LEVEL OF VULGARITIES, DONT READ!
BECAUSE U WILL HATE THE WAY U USE MY WORDS.
DEFINITELY NOT FOR KIND-HEARTED SOULS.

my readers would understand how i vent my anger through my raps.
and each time the rap is always about the same freaking thing.
nonetheless, this time, its the same fucking issue too.
so if u feel that im bullshitting or wateva shit, just leave.
as a matter of fact, i cant be bothered if u like it or not.

bitches and bastards
fuckers and chinas
look at the words that relate one another
al of which are creatures that disgust our races
i live in this home full of stresses
with the walls that are scareaming at my fa-ce
trying to tear the shits out of my as-ses
my soul is tired
my soul is sick
my heart is freaking dead
by the lies of my fucking dad
stop calling me ivan
and stop giving me your love
you told me you love me
oh are you true with these words
because all my curses are real and true for u
i hate you and thats the truth
i walked into the room and what do i see
you fucking body lying on the bed talking on the phone with some bitches
my fingers are counting and they are still counting
of the no. of moms i will get in the fucking future
thirteen fourteen or fifteen witches
coming all the way from china to lick our dicks
if this family break up and im to live wit you
trust me dad oh u should belive this
and im gonna fuck my step-moms
and kiss their pussies
while they shout your name asking for some help
i'll slap there faces and tell them to SHUT UP
beacuse since they step into this house of mine
their bodies and souls are for me to fuck and torture
argggh my head is splitting apart
of these hatred and bullshits that are pulling me aparat
and im left with nothing in my heart
just the love i have for her
and the love for my brothers in this world
this family is no longer the one i longed for
this home is no the one i wish for
so fuck you dad FUCK YOU FOR
ALL THESE HAPPINESS YOU BROUGHT TO MY LIFE.


i feel so much better.

happy birthday to mr small, small eye koh wee cheong, my beloved brother.

had a bbq with my brothers for wc birthday. and there was only like 10 people? its actually quite pathetic because it seems like we dont have many friends, or in fact, we dont have friends. haha. oh well, who cares anyway?

the night was crazy. i'll let the photos do the speakings.
















































































































































hopefully in my next life, these people could be my blood brothers. =)

you were the pieces of my past
with the memories so beautiful and sweet
you are the woman ive loved
the one that fulfilled all my dreams and promises
you will always be the one
that girl whom i always treasure deep in my heart.

Youth Crime

Juvenile (of young people) rioters are becoming more prevalent (common).

How it all started?
i) trivial matters
ii) remarks
iii) rumor
iv) use of vulgar language
v) staring incident

Violence was resorted in settling disputes and rioting cases often involved secret society gangs.

Attraction of gang:
1) ability to respond to the need of the youths that were not otherwise met.
2) To experience the sense of protection which he/she is deprived of
3) Youths who joined secret societies usually experienced a sense of alienation, powerlessness and low-self esteem.
4) To obtain support outside the traditional institutions(family and school)
5) Gang membership provided them with a sense of family, belonging and acceptance.

Gang: it caused its members to feel that violence was the norm, creating a subcultural dynamic that took on a momentum of its own. The gang’s culture is to amplify violence as a way to solve problems and as a display of machismo, courage, heroism, personal power and vengeance ( retaliation) .

Juvenile Shoplifters.

Shoplifting is one of the most common offences committed by juvenile offenders in Singapore.

Attraction of shoplifting:
1) negative peer influence
2) greed
3) thrill-seeking
4) succumbing(give way) to temptations

the reason is mainly because of the lack of self control and rational evaluative thinking on the part of the juvenile.

Other delinquent behaviours:
1) smoking
2) truancy
3) alcohol consumption
4) secret society


Juvenile Justice

The Juvenile court recognizes the potential for change and reform in young offenders and delinquent( guilty of persistent law-breaking) youths.

Measures to help the delinquent youths:
1) probation
2) community service
3) counseling
4) rehabilitation
5) family conferencing
6) peer group advisers
7) boot camps.

the approach to solving this issue is to incorporate elements of deterrence, incapacitation ( prevention) and rehabilitation. A balance will have to be struck between the need for rehabilitation and accountability for the offending behaviour.

i nid time to cool down, just relax for one freaking night and get through everything. because at the end of the day, we've to carry on with our lives. no doubt that the life ahead of us will be difficult, but its just the way God's put us through so that we'll emerge strong.

everyone has their unique ways of relieving stress. as for me, i write raps.
this rap song this rap song, now everybody is listening to my song.

ever wondered if i will get chosen by shady records to release a single or album of my own. well if i do have this chance, my first album title will be " tribute to the sweet china bitch" or "bitch it china". ok. ive big dreams.

one shot two shots three shots four
as u hear the gun shots go bump bump bump
and u see the bitches lying dead on the floor
opps i think i just kill my moms and its all my fault
well bitch it china bitches fuck your asses
piss your pussy and i punch ur faces
u kiss my daddy dick so am i supposed to call you mummy
just because you think u are some freaking hommie
but u aint living for one more day no more
because niggas at the backyards loading their guns holes
so they could have the fun of killing bitches
while ive the pleasure of raping dead witches

anyway, i would like to thank my brothers for helping my brother.
firstly, thank reeve for scolding that useless kid.
secondly, thank bkor for bullshiting and blessed us wit his powers.
thirdly, thank mei and kc for trying to incite my brother to beat that guy.

my brothers are the most important creatures in my life.

it makes me ponder,

what if they cb and anti me one day.

i went to yahoo and typed china.
this is what ive got.
























cool =)

broken.

i love my sister so much that im so afraid of her getting hurt. she's the most important girl in my life.

i just wonder ya.

Am i dreaming?
is this reality?
is this shit for real?

like what ive explained to jing.
im like in a room.
four corners around me.
all painted with words that say: family potraits
i sat in the middle of the room.
i felt nothing.
no saddness
no happiness.
i just felt im swallowed by the pitless void.

major exams are near.
a test of faith or strength?
but at this time?

but thank god,thank bkor, i still got some wonderful friends.
mr bullshit, mr xialan, mr small. 3 of which see me drunk last night.
raft who still kb me when he knows about it. nabei.
jing.
where's anon. i wanted to find her but she was busy celebrating her friend's birthday. shall make her feel guilty.
i haven tell stefanie yet, my beloved childhood friend. gah. maybe tomorrow.

kbye.

we make a pact to swear as sworn brothers. =)

bkor,small eye cheong, big eyevan, mei. see the mermaid at the end, its rave.






















our forehead were resting against one another.
we could hear each other breaths.
we could feel each other heartbeats.
our eyes are intersecting and they are speaking words that cant be heard.
our souls caressing,
our minds connected,
our heart tied by the love knot.
you leaned forward, kissed me on my left cheek.
i leaned forward and kissed you on your left cheek.
words unspoken but hearts linked.


credits of the comic "tsubasa Chronicles"

broken dreams.

shattered potraits.

pieces of glasses

piercing into my heart.

clock ticks

time passes.

tomorrow.

today.

lost.

confused

befuddled.

fuck.

china bitches.

broken.. family.. torn.. apart..

two years ago, i was at the esplanade watching the fireworks.
one year ago, i was at home typing an entry about 2004.
two years after, im alone at home facing the four corners of room. each corner of the room is devouring my soul, pulling me into the deep dark pits hidden behind these corners. what happened two years ago still stay fresh in my mind. the stark vividness of these memories seem to be playing in my dreams like a film without sound. every actions, every movements are being played at your own pace. like the movie "click", i can choose to pause at my favourite moments, fast forward the sad memories and rewind the sweet words she had spoken to me before.

so by now, most of my close friends will go:alright, theres goes ivan with his stories of his ex. wont he get tired over that girl? bullshit la.

the truth is, ive gotten over her. what i cant get over are those memories. as a matter of fact, i missed those days.

*wssssssssssssh*
today is 8/8/2004.
and great, today was a great and definitely the happiest day of my life. i had just went out with my sweetie molester, esther fan. shes now at her fellowship programme i suppose, doing some work throughout the whole night. i hope she is doing just fine. you want to know why i blog about what happened today? BECAUSE IM THE LUCKIEST MAN ON EARTH TO HAVE ESTHER AS MY GIRL. i wonder hwo many readers would be thinking that this guy has some screws loose in his head. yea yea yea, u guys are just jealous of me.
i can still remember everything that happened today, okay, i can remember because it happened only just now. bah. i met her at 6.30pm at the choa chu kang control station. okay, i wasnt late for our second date, but recalling back, i was late for 10 mins on our first date to catch the movie superman. while on the way to meet her, i thought she forget everything about the date. i kept messaging her, until the fourth of fifth did she replied that she will be late. reason? she was watching movie with her friends in the afternoon. thank god.
the mrt was freaking packed. people pushing around, struggling to get a space on board the already crowded mrt. and there was this guy, a bloody asshole. he almost tripped and fall onto my gal. ah, darn u. afraid of any possible mishaps, i held her closely to me.
the fireworks display starts at 8.30pm but we were already there at 7.30. oh great, we got to wait for one hour. and for this hour, we spend some "quality" time making fun of each other. there was this cute lil boy. he came over and sat beside us. he gave a smile to esther but not me. !@E#@$!@!3 because of my big eyes and head? i'll remember that kid! then we went on talking about our future, about how many kids we would wan? im only sec 4? too young for that i suppose. she almost slaughtered me when i said if she give birth to a kid next time, as the child's dad, i would like the child and no longer his/her mom. piak* one tight slap on my lap.
fifteen minutes to the fireworks display, we walked to the open space outside esplanade( aka wc's backyard). she held my pinkie finger, my right pinkie finger.
during the fireworks, i held your hands tighly and look at you. you look at me too. at this very moment, there's this very special feeling that ran through my soul. i knew from then, that this gal standing in front of me, will be the girl of my life. and i will not let her go unless she let me go. didnt tell her these words but i belive that our thoughts are already known.
the fireworks ended fast enough, and the crowd start to disperse. walking to the outdoor performance stage, i saw jessie with shaun. okay, quite suprised to see someone i know among this pack of people.
we then proceed to the fountain which is at the entrance of the esplanade. we sat over there. now eveything happen to quickly.
our forehead were resting against one another.
we could hear each other breaths.
we could feel each other heartbeats.
our eyes are intersecting and they are speaking words that cant be heard.
our souls caressing, our minds in hold, our heart tied by the love knot.
you leaned forward, kissed me on my left cheek.
i leaned forward and kissed you on your left cheek.
words unspoken but hearts linked.

im so glad to have you as my girl, and you are the sweetest person that ever cross my life.

=)

MATCHBOOK ROMANCE LYRICS
"Promise"

What would you say if I asked you not to go
To forget everyone, forget everything and start over with me
Would you take my hand and never let me go
Promise me you'll never let me go

And now the stars aren't out tonight,
But neither are we to look up at them
Why does hello feel like goodbye?
These memories can't replace,
These wishes I wished and dreams I chased
Take this broken heart and make it right

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
I thought you should know,
You're not making this easy

I never thought I'd be the one to say
Please don't, well please don't leave me



i dont want any idiotic comments and tags regarding this entry. comments made are sensitive and actions will be taken against those who try to be arrogant. ignorance is not a bliss.

oh great, some people will start saying: ivan, u can use time studying instead of drawing or rapping.

great, reeve married

no matter how busy i am, or how stressful life could be, ive to take out sometime to write this entry for my beloved brother, RAVE TAN CAR KIA.

reeve, often known as rave, was a young and innocent kid when he was in the primary school. the emphasis of the previous sentence is the word WAS and i meant it is the past. ok. hes studied in Nan Hua Primary School which was one of the prestigous schools in singapore. growing up, he was loved by his FATHER and mother. fyi, his dad is dead already.

scoring a duno how many marks for psle, he was posted to unity secondary school, where everything starts to change. he joined gang at the age of 15, smoke at the age of 16, lost his virginity when he was 10(lol), pierced his tounge by himself, got caught for stealing at 16, and also got caught in school for vandalism(which i was got it too).

now at the age of 17 going 18, rave tan is going to be a dad, a married man, a mature man. the prophency is fulfiled, rave will be the first one to be married. in the past, he used to be the one forcing us to smoke. however, its the other way round now, we are forcing him to smoke.

congrats rave, i want to be ur kid god-father.

rave, rush. SIAN

tribute

tribute to the China bitches, be it study mamas, masseurs or student-mistresses, its for you guys.

Rap.

China bitch
chinese witch
stinky vagina with a fuckin dick
china bitch
chinese witch
make me yours and im grant your wish

the reports are all about you you stupid freak
STUDENT BY DAY MISTRESS BY NIGHT
the press is discussing bout you asshole
about you and your fellow sistas
you are a social problem you idiot
and homes are breaking because you entered
this society that uphold justice
if only there is a law
that condemn china bitches
i woner will i get sure for this shit
or go to jail for discriminating all these fuckers
or maybe i will go to jail for this
for the fact that i rape you and kill you and rape u thee
you cause children to cry
you cause wifes to die
you cause me to whine
over your deep dark cheebye
i hate to say this bitch i really hate it
oh i mean im love to say this and i love it
that may god kill you and destroy ur ass

forget ll about the forgiveness
forget all about love
sweet revenge is call for you
and im gonna show you how i play it on you
be careful bitch and watch your steps
you'll never know when the next moment you will fall
because the next time i get your number
im gonna call you and rap these to you
oh bitch it i forget
that you chinese dont understand raps
all you know is cheat on money
so this is for you
fuck you whack.

I hv been taG!
I have been tagged by ONG CHUNHUI .

Once you've been tagged, you have to write a blog with 6 weird facts/things/habits about yourself, saying who tagged you. In the end you need to choose the 5 people to be tagged and list their names. No tag backs.

INSTRUCTIONS:1. Do the following without complaining.
2. Choose 5 people to do this after you've completed yours.
3. Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say that he/she has been tagged.
4. Start your post with "I have been tagged!" then do this.

FAVOURITES:
color: purple
food:china porridge
song: eminem songs
movie: SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS
sport: tennis? though i suck at this.
day of the week: friday
season: spring
ice-cream: none.

CURRENT:
mood: stress.
taste: viceroy
clothes: pjc pe t
desktop: peps saxophone section
time: 12.25am
surroundings: hall?
annoyance: tttt dulai

FIRSTS:
best friend:brothers.
crush: xinrong? haa. onli those in peps will know
movie:dun remember.
music:slim shady by eminem

LASTS:
cigarette: half an hour ago
drink: coffee
ride: bicycle
movie:pirates of carribean, with sab
phone call:peng yan
CD: eminem marshall mathers LP

HAVE YOU EVER:
dated one of your best friends: mmm. yep.
been arrested: nah. im not like reeve.
skinny-dipped: wat the?
been on tv: nah.
kissed someone you don't know: nope.

gosh, i sound like a twit, stating all the i love and likes that twits usually do.