happy birthday wee cheong

sometime i just wish i can live in malaysia longer. cause i cant bear to leave my lele. ha. i love her more than anyone else =] wee~~

anyway. i hope today is gonna be a fine fine fine day. i'm goin g out with my gang of friends later to celebrate wee cheong's birthday. haa. its gonna be nice one though. first stop is k box follow by 302. haa.. everyone in this group have a nick name.
me-->puay,big-head ghost,bomber
siang lung->mei,sia lan kia
junjie->b kor, big stomach
reeve->hey-reeve, ra-ef,honkster
wee-cheong->du lan kia, outside
teric->honkster,terrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry
apart from having a nick, everyone in this group will die miserably.
i will die from head concussion because i curse too many people.siang lung will die from hunger, too poor to even buy food. junjie will die of coughing, bronchitis. reeve going to die of lung cancer because he smokes too much. teric is going to die of hunger too, cause he spent too much money on his meis. wee cheong, haa, he's too fortunate, soooo.. i guess he won die so early =]

hopefully i won bomb them today, or rather, i wish i will bomb them. haa..she's working at lot one today. but i'll be at suntec. wowowooww.. so far!!!!gonna pray hard that her dad is not going to fetch her home, so i will get a chance.. wekekeke =x but i guess there's gonna be those lot one ppl gonna xian her. %##^%$&$%&%#%$ i cant do anything =\ nvm.. dont wana think too much too.

things will go smoothly for me.
peace out^
fcuk u` =]

obsession

another freestyle rap

i aint trying to be eminem
i am just trying to show who i am
through this rap then i had
soo ladies and gentlemen,
i hope u guys will like this gag

i got myself into obsession
a depression that is trying to gain some attention
and now gal she losing her fashion
baby, i'm losing my fraction
mocking birds go mocking like a bird
eminem goes around trying to be some ham
ivan walks around, promoting his pimp-amp
always thought raps to be violent and vulgar
well, take a look at mine, maybe you'll find yourself being bulgar
gee, dont cry during the night when u are sad
cause baby i am there to accompany when you are drag
u've got the sweetest smile i've ever seen
baby, you make my world so clean
but you're a popular gal
i am a geek which wont get luvr
i'm tired for all these shit
i'm bored for all these greeks
i'm sick of all these bricks
gal, can i ever love u once?

night

her name is call

she's sweet. she's cute. she's lovely. she's pretty.love is blind. gee. that what me and zhan had been saying for the past one week. but anyway, i'm starting to get a little tired. low self-esteem, no confidence, i dont think there's anything i get achieve in life right now. true love? do they ever exist? have i ever felt their existence? or is it just another illusion i have been dreaming of all the time. it' simple to fall in love with a girl, but it is never easy to forget one. i'm afraid. afraid of something that i'm not sure either. the fear that makes my muscles go tense, its sending shivers down my nerves. i'm scared. scared of another fake love. can i ever commit myself to a relationship? or like some idiots, let's just flirt around. should i be a pimp? a sucker who deals with prostitutes. or should i be like a gentleman? who only wish for the girl to be happy? the whole world is knowing bout' my dirty lil' secret, one which i would classified as mission impossible.

i havent spoke to jeanie for quite some time, except the short period of time during cca. it seems things are always getting complexed between my thoughts and being a friend of hers. maybe sometime my mind just dont seem satisfied with what i've got. i aint trying to say i'm a perfectionist, but maybe i just hope to be at higher level then what i've got at the present. its seems to me that i often misunderstand her easily, sensitive to some idiotic issues. sometime, i just feel that friends, they dont last forever. they are just a junction in our life. nevertheless, god bless jeanie as long as i live. but i've got a feeling i will die early. maybe at a age of 18?

i see some improvements in my studies. i just hope i'l reap what i sow and what goes around, comes around. sometime its just sickening to see some asses sleeping in lectures or tutorials, but at the of day, they did well for their tests. whereas muggers like me, the effort put in does not seems to always pay off. ahh.. fuck these guys. *no offence*

i'll just hope that things will get better for me and maybe better for her and everyone too.
ciao`

izit worth it?

what if one day, the girl you love got into an accident? and as a result, she lost both of her eyes. will you, donate your eyes just to let her see again? this question came to my mind when i was watching the mv with bryan. the mv is title: because i am a girl, by kiss. i came to a conclusion and that is, i will. i simply hope she will stay healthy and be happy. =] god bless her

broke up

we had a talk by dr william tan today during assembly. he gave us a very inspirational talk which make me feels aspire by his determination and the heart of never dying. to afiq: i will pass my 2.4.. !@#$#%^$%@^$^&%

school was tired and boring. i had my econ test, it was quite easy. but i still do not have the confident to score high =\ anyway, i didn get to see her today in school at all. suddenly, i love school so much. for the fact that i cant see her on the weekends =x things get worst when an obsession becomes an affection. but i am sure it will soon turn out to be defection =] so its best to focus more on my studies and pass my promos.

i've just returned from malaysia and i miss my baby alot, lele =] every alternate week i went to malaysia, she has grown a lot. and i am sure she will grow up to become a pretty lady.

i'm now at b kor house. went straight there after i've reached singapore.

what's love anyway?
where's love anyway?
a true affection or a mere obsession?
happiness and the determination to achieve it
will i ever get it anyway?
i hope this time round
things will get better for me
i hope and i pray =]

a buddy of mine just broke up with his girlfriend. a relationship that has no use carrying on, a friendship that is broken apart. everyone get hurt in a game call love. so why love? the need for a support, a reliable shoulder to rest on when we are down, a trustable person to confront to, a hand to hold on. we all need love afterall. be it friendship or relationship, love is everywhere. we got to learn to appreciate it, that's all. for me and mei, getting back what we gave out in a relationship, is it possible? can we trust love?

all guys
get your left hand up at grab your nuts
then put your right hand up in the air
show the gals your middle fingers
and say
fuck u bitch! =]
*not offending anyone if you are not a bitch =]

take care and god bless you
beware, i've got a dual-character syndrome

let me hold you

alright, everyone from her class knows me =]
clap hands*
everyday i kinda di siao =]
clap hands*
she's got a lot of people going after her =]
clap hands*
afiq is an ass =]
clap hands*
econ test tmr =]
clap hands*
going msia tmr =]
clap hands*
cant go to ihg on sat =]
clap hands*

fuck you debbie debbie!
eminem anger management tour dvd rox!
influential and vulgar too
hip hop and great raps
gee, i hope to be a famous rapper one day
bahx bahx bahx
anyway, back to reality
i love vc!

fireworks

sunday, i went to see the fireworks. its was beautiful. i went to watch it with b kor, mei, reaf,teric. haa.. its was fun though. like what we always do when we get together, troubles makers. reeve scolded a child, we laughed like idiots in the mrt, joking with racist jokes, blahx blahx blahx. the fireworks lasted for like, 20 mins? its was damn nice nice nice =] this time round, i am glad to say, no memories came coming back. =] but i was messaging someone. wekekekeke =x (teric laughter)

joyce, i dun wana see u sad everyday. i can feel that ache in my heart the way u feel it too ya? u haf great friends in poly, dont you? ppl like dean? although i duno who he or she is, but i am sure that he or she is very concern bout u too. so smile =] things will get better each day. i'll pray for you =]

this week is my test week again. so many assignments and tutorials to complete. ghee.. i am so afraid that i would fail my promos. with the fact that i scored so badly for my ca1, i hardly haf hope that i can pass my ca2 or promos. ahhhhhhhhhhh! i am going crazy at this rate. the burden are building up on my shoulders again. haish.

this sunday is study day again. this time round, there's 5 articles to finish reading and have it summarise. interesting, doesnt it? forming a study group is so much better. =]

ciao` having a physics test tmr. fuck!
i've bought eminem anger management tour dvd. wakakaka
everyone! put your middle fingers up and say! fuck u debbie debbie!

midnight wind

the wind during the seventh month is definitely much colder, sending cold shivers down my spine. walking home alone during the midnight is like walking through the road of hades, where you feel the souls moving pass you. brrrrrr~~~ i dont want to elaborate too much on this, its HARMFUL.

i was with a bunch of bastard friends just now. i call it the fucking gang, for the fact that everyone is a fucking asshole. we were slacking around at blk 344 playground, talking about stuff that were in the past. the past and memories replayed constantly in our mind. the fightings,sparring,def jam,troubles and not to forget, the hardships we've been through. i felt childish for my past actions, the arrogant attitude towards the society. haa. but its in the past.=] time passes fast. while they were talking among themselves, i fell deeply into my own thoughts as i looked towards the eighth storey. she stayed there. bahx bahx . its in the past. haa =]. i only told mei about it.

tomorrow its the ndp celebration in school. i cant wait for it. the vc members have duties to carry out tomorrow. we've to snap some shots of the celebration. but its GOOD! pj' dance club is performing a hip-hop dance moves. weee~~
part1)confession to my obsession. haa.. there's this girl in dance club. she's called michelle. me and zhan gave her a initial, we called her sweet sweet girl. ghee. she dances well and is damn cute =x i want to know her. =] like i say like i say, its only an obsession. OBSESSION!!!! which means, it will subside after somedays.haha. =] soooo, its nothing. nothing. nothing.wakakaka =x

this para is dedicated to a gal, call xy. she's my loyal reader, and i am also her loyal reader too. =x anyway, i just hope she understand that life's is never fair. let me emphasize the word, NEVER! nevertheless, there's always a friend call pimp who will always be there for her =] hush* hush* the rain will stop and the sun will rise again* smile * grin*

and to end this entry, i would like to dedicate this para to my lil' sister, jasmine. she's growing up and that's a reality. sometime i just hope she'll stay innocent and freed from the harsh reality of this world. the hectic life and trembling workload that fall on all adults shoulders. sometime i just hope she wont grow up. but we cant stop this cycle, the cycle of life, the cycle of birth and death. i'll just pray to god, that she'll grow up mature and never be ignorant to the things that are revolving around her. maybe i am little protective but i'm afraid she'll get cheated by guys. and if any guys dare to bully or cheat on her, rest assure him that his ass and dick are going to be punch by me. gang or no gang, fighter or no fighter, i'll never let any shit bring me down if he dare bully my sister. =] SO FUCK YOU! *its only to those who cheated her and my SWEET CUTE brother, eugene ng. haha.evil grin* i'll pray for her to get a good boyfriend. =]

god,bless everyone
god,bless her
god,
kill me =]

let me hold you

!seventh month

seventh month had officially commence. some precautions from ivan. precaution no. 1) dont go swimming, espically in the seas. you'll never know if someone pull your legs. no.2) dont kick things and litters that are thrown on the floor. 'they may be 'using' it. no.3)dont go out too late too often. they may be having a party and you are the extra. =x haha no.4) run away when you see norman, cause he is a liar.

i met up with weiling and we had a short chat. it's been since my birthday when we last met. things do happen afterall. they come and go, just like the mood of a typhoon. i've been thinking lots of things lately. its not about studies, but more of emo stuff. its seem as if i had intervene with some important issues of destiny that i've crossed. some churches dont allow bgr among the youths. i wondered whether she broke up with me because of that reason. i doubt so anyway. ghee. think i should i forget about it. its no use brooding over it.

we had formed the naziB in pjc. it consist of norman,afiq,zhanyue,me and bryan. ha! we destroy and cause terror. =] i love this! me and zhan yue had quite a new hobby recently. we shared lots of things about cute and sweet and love is blind. haa.. crypted code. wakakakaka .

life is messed up. love is screwed up. friendship is torn apart.
i love to view the night sky. the stars and constellations forming the night, they seem to be telling a story that live so true. i placed all my memories with them. i shared my secrets with them too. i told them to bless her, to watch over her during her nights and dreams. they told me, that love can never be force and just let nature take its course. i replied with an answer that surprise them. i told them that i just want her to be happy with the guy she love, and thats all i ever wished for. they said they will make my prayers come true and i hope so too.

i live my life for you. i gave it all up for you. fantasy =]